I went to the gym for a speed workout this morning, two 1-mile repeats with warmup, cooldown, etc., for a total of 5 miles. My first mile was in 8:57 and the second was in 9:05. I would have liked to have gotten that second mile under 9:00 and maybe if I'd realized it wasn't going to be I could have pushed harder, but that's okay. Originally my plan called for 9:10 miles and I just this morning decided I could go faster, so I'll content myself with what I did.
I am still trying to hit an 8:30 mile so I may have to start doing some shorter faster intervals in my speed sessions, just to get my body used to the quicker turnover. I feel like I've done a bunch of 9-minute miles now and if I want to go faster I'm going to have to practice going faster. I mean, I can run faster than 9:00 pace, heck, I can run faster than an 8:30 pace, but right now I don't know just how long I can go at that speed.
I have friends who routinely run sub-8:00 miles and I'm confounded. Never mind the elite runners, even finishing a 5k in 25 minutes seems amazingly fast to me. I think until I see myself going faster (even for shorter distances) I won't really believe it's possible for me.
Another nice treat at the gym today is that I continue to lose weight (I only weigh myself there and only about every ten days or so). I'm almost back to where I was before Champ/Goober* was born. I'm looking to lose another 10-15 pounds and/or get more muscle... I don't know if I'll end up losing that much but at the very least I want to no longer be "overweight" by the health charts. Yes, I'm vain that way. Plus, I own some t-shirts that are just a wee bit too tight still (thanks to "M" not meaning the same thing everywhere you go), and I'd like to be able to wear them with more confidence.
So, the scared part. I met yesterday with the admissions director for a program I am thinking about enrolling in. We didn't talk about me, it was just an opportunity for me to get some questions answered before I move ahead. It would mean a complete change of career and take a lot of work just to get into. It's very exciting... and right now I'm scared witless. But then I think about doing what I'm doing for the rest of my life, or even a variant of it, and that scares me even more.
In some ways this new career would be a circling round to what I grew up thinking I would be doing, not quite but kind of a parallel path, so the George Eliot quote keeps coming into my head, "It's never too late to be who you might have been." I should get that tattooed on my forehead maybe.
Oh, between the fast miles and the fast thoughts, my tummy is in turmoil. Sigh.
*Despite our best efforts, "Goober" seems to be sticking as a nickname. From his brother's calling him "Goo", as in the sound he thinks a baby makes. Not that Goober ever actually says "goo".